18 months

18NumberEighteenInCircle18 months, 1 & 1/2 years, 546 days. That’s how long we’ve been TTC. Don’t get me wrong, I know in the infertility community this is nothing compared to the length of time some people struggle…..but regardless, it is a long time….and something about this number is just tough for me. I realize this is illogical, but 18 months makes me think I should have had 2 babies by now…and yet I’m not even pregnant with my first.

Infertility robs us, it robs us of the normal excitement of TTC and getting pregnant. Instead we’re having timed intercourse, fertility treatments, taking medications/injections, doing anything/everything to get us closer to that elusive BFP.

I know this seems like a really negative post, I just needed to vent. I’m very excited and hopeful going into our next cycle, IUI #4 with injectables…..but I just wanted to reflect today on that number, 18. Hoping & praying that number doesn’t get too much bigger before I’m pregnant. 😉

Advertisements

25 thoughts on “18 months

  1. Okay, this post made me have memories of so much sadness, AND it made me giggle – because no way in hell would you want to be pregnant with back to back pregnancies. 🙂

    But yes, I get that 18 month milestone being a punch to the gut. At 18 months we were at the RE deciding to do an injectables IUI cycle, and it felt like we had been TTC forever. It’s amazing how cycle after cycle of BFNs can totally wreak havoc on your physche and hope. On the up side, after 21 months of TTC I found out I was pregnant with my daughter after a Clomid + Menopur injectibles IUI cycle, and it was ALL worth it. SO hoping the same for you!!

    • LOL. I know I wouldn’t have wanted that…..but the number just seems significant to me. I’ll find out my exact protocol at my next meeting with our RE (4/8), but it’ll be some combination of Clomid & Repronex/Menopur with IUI too….hoping this does the trick for us too. I just hate the unknown, I wish someone could tell me it’s going to take x months. The control freak in me can’t take it!

  2. I know 2 people who were pregnant with back to back babies. Whoops! One we just found out about last weekend. We are just ahead of you at 20 months but I think time is irrelevant. Once you reach that one year mark there is no turning back. Heartache and infertility go hand in hand no matter where you are on your journey.

    • Yikes! I think I’d rather have twins then to have 2 only 9 months apart. I agree about the time thing, once you pass that year mark it’s all pretty painful.

  3. Any amount of time struggling with infertility is soooo painful. I’m so so sorry. It just freaking sucks. Just remember, you’ve got a great plan for next cycle and this is going to be it!!

  4. Hugs!! I know how you feel. We’re a little over 18 months and I’ve had the exact same thought, 2 babies…You put it so well, when you described what infertility does as it robs us from enjoying having a baby. Let’s hope our luck turns around very soon!!

  5. Ah, doll, I am so sorry that we are hitting on such a hard anniversary! Anytime to struggle with IF is the worst, making a few months really seem like eternity. But I am rooting for you and know that when it does happen, you are going to be in the perfect place in your life! Thinking of you, doll, make sure to baby yourself a bit, K?

    • Oh I know right….these past 18 months have felt like YEARS! I fully plan to, getting a manicure & pedicure right after work today 🙂 Thanks lady. Hope you’re doing okay.

    • It doesn’t get easier, or cheaper. We have pretty good insurance, and have only done testing, laprascopy, and 3 IUI’s and we’re already almost at 5k. Hang in there! This community has been wonderful to me. It’s a great place to vent and get answers!! Hoping your journey doesn’t last much longer either!

  6. 18, going on 19 months for us as well. It’s so hard, I understand. It’s so hard to see couples married with children who didn’t even know each other when my husband and I started trying.

  7. I hear ya! July will be 2 years for us TTC and one year with out RE. It’s shocking how much time has passed. I feel like I’m in baby limbo while everyone’s lives are moving on. I’ve been to more baby showers than I’ve had follicles this year. Keep your head up and find strength in knowing you aren’t alone, and that at the end of this journey we will be exceptionally patient parents 😉

    • Ouch! I have definitely found strength in knowing I’m not alone through the blog community! Yes, I guarantee we will be VERY patient parents when it’s all said and done!!

Leave a Reply

Please log in using one of these methods to post your comment:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s