The 2ww is just plain exhausting. The irony is not lost on me, waiting should not be exhausting….but in this instance it totally is. I decided to test this morning (WAY TOO EARLY, I KNOW!!!) because I hoped maybe I was THAT GIRL that got a BFP at only 8dpiui….well I’m not, at least not this time. For whatever reason (honestly, nothing to do with my BFN this morning) I just feel out this cycle….and that made me very sad. And then I started wondering if being so sad was a pregnancy symptom….see how crazy I am right now?!?!
If this cycle doesn’t work I’m throwing around the idea of taking the summer off and getting serious about losing weight and enjoying the summer. I think I may just need a break from it all for a few months. It’s such a catch 22, because I want my baby so badly, but I just don’t know how many more times I can do this before I break. I just don’t know.
Still not giving up hope for this cycle, just trying to prepare myself for what the next week holds. I’m going out of town for work Thursday-Sunday this week, so I’ll definitely test on Thursday (11dpiui)….to decide if I can drink this weekend or not.
Next Monday, the 19th, is my beta test…..but if I’m still getting negative HPT’s my RE will just discuss the plan for the next cycle…if we decide to push forward at this time.
Unsure of when I’ll post about my results of this cycle, but I WILL be blogging about it either way. I decided I couldn’t shut everyone out, I need my select group of friends and family to be with me throughout this WHOLE journey, not just pieces. The support I receive through this blog is just incredible, it is so helpful to me!!