Methotrexate for ectopic pregnancy — my experience

mymethotrexateexperience

I know I’ve been updating you throughout my ectopic pregnancy but I’ve decided to write a summary blog post about my methotrexate experience as a reference for anyone who might be going through a similar experience now or in the future. When I was going through my ectopic I found a few blogs that were very helpful, so I wanted to share my experience too.

I found out on August 28th (12dpiui) that I was pregnant for the second time (my first pregnancy was a chemical pregnancy). Although my HCG was very low I was highly optimistic that I had a late implanter and that everything would be okay. Over the next two weeks I continued to have regular blood draws and my HCG was appropriately doubling every 48 hours, although when looking at Beta charts online my numbers still seemed low compared to most healthy pregnancies. I continued to be hopeful and excited for our baby. Continue reading

The neverending story

image194-this-gritty-concept-art-is-everything-i-want-from-a-neverending-story-remakeI had another blood draw this past Monday, THIRTEEN WEEKS after my first dose of methotrexate for my ectopic pregnancy….and the result was 8. My HCG is still 8, after all this time. My RE doesn’t seem concerned about it, and just asked that I retest in another 2 months, but JEEZ!!!!!!!!!! Continue reading

9 weeks post methotrexate

imageFor the past few weeks I’ve been down to just once a week blood draws….last Monday my HCG was 20, and this Monday it was 21….which was a problem. My levels should be going down not staying the same, and definitely not going up. My RE scheduled another appointment with me this morning to discuss and do more testing.

He told me that sometimes in these cases your body can build up antibodies to the HCG and will show that you still have it in  your blood stream even when you really don’t. He said the way they can test this would be to do another HCG….and split the sample into 2 vials. Test 1 sample regularly, and test the other by adding equal parts water to dilute the sample by 50%…..if I still had HCG in my system the levels today should have been 20 & 10, but if it was just the antibodies my levels would be 20 & 20. Sounds confusing right?? Well it sure confused me too. Continue reading

Checking in

IMG_8248Sorry it’s been so long since I have updated, I didn’t mean to neglect my blog or you guys. I’ve still been reading all of your blogs, but just haven’t had it in me to update lately.

Things have been really rough these past few weeks. Continue reading

Dose #2

ready to get back to normalYesterday I went into the ER (the only place that can administer the drug in my area) for 2 more shots of Methotrexate (the dose is divided into 2 shots), one in each butt cheek. The shots didn’t hurt this time. Maybe I had a more skilled nurse, or maybe I’m just so used to being poked and prodded over these last few weeks it didn’t phase me as much. I even went into work after I was finished this time. I did skip class last night though, in addition to the MTHX I have a cold right now (my 2nd since my first dose of MTHX) and I just felt so worn out. MTHX really does a number on your immune system (since it basically kills tons of cells, even the good ones), plus you’re not allowed to take any vitamins until your HCG returns to 0. When I got home from work I changed into my sweats and got into bed. I fell asleep at 6:30 pm and didn’t wake until 7:00 am this morning. TGIF today for sure. I can’t wait to lay in the bed all weekend. Continue reading

Maintaining your Marriage after a Miscarriage

I found this blog post today (a guest blog post on In All You Do written by Lindsey Bell). I got a lot from the post, and wanted to share for those of you who might be working through a similar situation. Lindsey gave 5 really great tips (I’ve shared my favorite below) of how to maintain your marriage after a miscarriage…..I know I’m struggling right now, and I think there is a lot of truth to the tips she gave.  Continue reading

My heart is literally hurting

I had another check-up today, they took more blood (my poor arms) and did another ultrasound. My HCG is finally dropping like it should (it was 513 today), so it looks like I will be able to avoid another methotraxate shot or any type of surgery…..excellent news. Also, my ultrasound was perfect, but when my RE told me we were just about through this and we were going to take a month off then finally get me pregnant again I burst into tears. I didn’t have the heart to mention anything to him today about us quitting, and there’s really no point at this time anyway because I hope and pray that my husband changes his mind. I just said thank you and left his office crying all the way to my car. It literally makes my heart hurt at the thought of not trying again…..I just feel like we are SO CLOSE!!!!!!!!! I have to go back in for more blood work on Thursday.

Continue reading

National Pregnancy & Infant Loss Awareness Day

pregnancy&infantlossawarenessmonthIf you’ve never lost a child, experienced a miscarriage or a still birth you might not know that October is National Pregnancy & Infant Loss Awareness Month. More specifically, October 15th is a universal day of remembrance for pregnancy loss and infant death. This day is observed with remembrance ceremonies and candle-lighting vigils….I know I never knew something like this existed until it applied to me.

Did you know that:

  • One in four pregnancies ends in the loss of a baby
  • The loss of a child is recognized as the most intense cause of grief
  • Parents never “get over” the loss of a child – no matter the age
  • Parents experiencing grief without supportive care can have debilitating consequences such as PTSD, depression and anxiety that could further result in job loss, divorce, difficulties in daily living, or impediments with parenting of living children

Continue reading

Ectopic update

This morning I had another follow up appointment with my RE. I had another ultrasound and he said everything was looking good….no cysts and no fluid, both good signs. I also had more blood work done including a CBC (complete blood count), another HCG beta draw, a comprehensive metabolic panel, and AST (SGOT)….not sure what that one is for. After the ultrasound & blood work I went into my RE’s office and we chatted about what comes next.

readytomoveonSo far my HCG levels have been dropping since my methotrexate shot on September 15th, but not at the rate that they generally like to see. For now, since I’m having no pain my RE doesn’t think it’s necessary to administer another shot of methotrexate, but if for some reason my levels start to level off and stop dropping we will have to do another at that point. He said he would call me this afternoon with today’s results and tell me when he needed me to come back in for another blood draw. I’m just so ready for this to be OVER so we can move on…..it’s such a long drawn out process….but I still probably have a few more weeks until my HCG returns to 0….on Monday it was at 1,290. Continue reading

Grief

recovery-from-miscarriage

Everyone I’ve talked to said I will need several months to recover and heal from our loss….but everything in me just wants to keep pushing forward NOW! Maybe I’m not the “normal”, or maybe the real grief hasn’t hit me yet….but I’m not that sad anymore. I was sad for a few days….REALLY sad, but I don’t feel too bad now. I just hate that I have to wait three whole months before we can try again.  Continue reading